It's the opposite of prank calls: Hilariously real incoming calls over a 14-year span from people dialing the wrong number trying to reach pizza places, and sometimes a lady named Shirley! Over 67 minutes of laughs for less than the cost of a pizza!

22 MP3 Songs in this album (66:53) !
Related styles: Spoken Word: Prank Calls, Spoken Word: Comedy, Mood: Quirky

People who are interested in Crank Yankers Jerky Boys Jim Florentine should consider this download.


Details:
They Clicks: The introduction of the Clicks, "..a round doughy treat filled with feta and mozerella.. and when you bite into it, it goes 'Click!' ". It's something the marketing girls came up with and it's free. Well, plus a dollar. For they labor.

Meet Shirley: Shirley's getting a call from her friend Jessica (misheard as Raruska) to be alerted that Raruska can't pick her up because of the weather. Instead, confusion mounts as Raruska is told conflicting reports as to what Shirley is doing at the moment, including trying to play Star Wars Virtual, which is challenge with the virtual reality goggles because she is also wearing her curlers.

Coach Craig I, II, III and IV: A staggering four-call series starring Coach Craig from "The Boys And The Girls Club" who has been trying in vein to get his pizza for over three hours. Throughout his saga, he encounters four different guest-star call-takers, all with their unprofessional quirks and misgivings. By his second call, reports that a cancellation was made sparks a frenzy. Frustration mounts as his next call was met with a very confused manager. The series is capped off by a hilarious attempt to try to talk basketball with Coach Craig in hopes he'll get his mind off the missing pizza, which works until the call-taker runs out of things to say about basketball. Who funna win the western division, anyway?

Cok-a-sheen I and II: A timeless and oft-quoted call, starring a woman calling from a local motel who wanted to add a two-liter of soda to her order, only to be informed that if she were to seek a soda from her motel's "Coke Machine", she will undoubtedly save some money. This was not met with appreciation, as her callback has her demanding to speak to someone in charge, namely because, as she specifically puts it "One yo' 'ployees axt if we had a cok-a-sheen up a-round where we stay at!" -- which, once translated into the Queen's English, is not only unethical, but against the law in sixteen states. This complaint is complicated by the fight that breaks out in the back kitchen with a pizza cutter used as a weapon. Ten full minutes of truly unbelievable ridiculousness.

Mandarin Orange Topping: One of the original classics from 1995. When the caller is told that "we're out of pepperoni", will he accept the alternate offer of our new topping, Mandarin orange?

Tax Free Weekend I, II and III: Tax Free Weekend normally applies to school supplies, but does it apply to pizza? Caller asks for Canadian bacon but is told we're out of that and is offered ham topping instead; and because it's the Tax Free Weekend, if they can consider pizza as a school supply, they can qualify for having the taxes waived! Caller is forced to repeat a phrase that qualifies her for the Tax Free Weekend discount, but now she wants to "order this pizza and get off this phone... I hope they recording this call!" The third installment in this series features one of the greatest call-backs ever. She is now transferred to the manager, who tells her that due to a "flop in the inventory device" we might have lost her order. "Is this D'mnlna-Rochelle N'hampton?" When she repeats her original order with ham she is now told that we're out of ham, but we have Canadian bacon! Things get really out of hand when she's offered The Clicks, this time made by the Abilene Christian Girls. As a finale, when she tries to tack on Buffalo wings, she?s offered Rochester wings instead. How much does this woman take? Find out in this three-call series totaling ten minutes of hilarity!

Out of Cheese I and II: How does an entire pizza delivery chain across the whole city run out of cheese?

Emergency Room I, II and III: In a bid to get pizza delivered to the emergency room, this nurse is subjected to the debut of the bombastic hold music advertising The Clicks Deluxe. Capped off by the unbelievably hilarious third call-back from the very patient nurse who is now transferred to a very schitzy neurotic manager.

No Coupon: A simple exchange turns ugly very quick when it's discovered that a coupon is required for specials to be had.

Vidalia Onions: Once the caller is informed we're a subsidiary of the Vidalia Onion Corporation, things get a little silly.

On a Submarine: Same caller from the Vidalia Onions call, but this time is misheard as calling from a submarine.

Beekeepers: Caller is accused of being a part of the Beekeepers Convention in town for the weekend.

Pepperoni Song: In this timeless classic from 1997, the caller doesn't quite grasp that we're out of pepperoni until it's sung to him to the tune of Girl From Ipanema.