MP3 Kitten on the Keys - Salty Meat Girl
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17 MP3 Songs
POP: Piano, ROCK: Punk
Kitten on the Keys is the Ginzu knife of the stage-she slices, dices and juliannes in a variety of genres and counter cultures including the neo burlesque/vaudeville/dark cabaret scenes worldwide! When not tickling the ivories, stroking the uke, or squeezing her accordion , this multi tasking vaudeville vamp is a musical MC who announces acts w/ a putty panache that will tickle your funnybone and stir your nethers. She's got a potty mouth and a dirty mind aimed to TEASE!
With four self produced CD's under her belt, this one ma'am band puts Sin in her syncopation for a monkey spankin' good time!!
Known as the musical snackcake with the moist creamy center, Kitten will tantalize your tastebuds with her spunky mischievous humor.
She's toured the US and Canada with Burlesquefest, Performed at all of the Teaseorama Burlesque Showcases, Co-MC'd the World Famous Exotic World Burlesque Pageant and Strip Tease Reunion in Hellandale and Las Vegas for the past several years, won a Golden Pastie Award at the NY Burlesque Festival for being "the biggest Tease", won Best Costume at Exotic World 2005, played Liberace's mirrored Baldwin grand Piano in his Museum in Las Vegas, won a SF Weekly Music Award in 2003 in the BEYOND category, been featured in numerous national publications, including a large article in SHIMMY magazine!, Star and Garter, Belgian ELLE, Cool and Strange Music, Keyboard Magazine, CURVE, Style Monte Carlo and has appeared on Q TV's the Queer Edge , Bravos's Top Chef, MTVs My Super Sweet 16, HBO's Reel Sex, CANAL + in Paris, and dazzled audiences across the pond and beyond with the show Cabaret New Burlesque.
Kitten has a vintage exuberance that is hard to resist!!
Her eyebrow raising antics had them rolling in the aisles in PARIS!
The French appropriately called her "The Punk Rock Betty Boop'.
She is heavily featured in the French Coffee table book "Legend's du Striptease" by Remy Fuentes available on French Amazon.com.
Her cute, kinky and clever original cabaret tunes revive the mirth and merriment of the good ol days with a deliriously decadent twist.
She's sassy or classy take your pick.
Winter found Kitten in the Keys performing in the Twisted Cabaret Of The Damned-opening for punk legend's the DAMNED in the UK! www.officialdamned.com
ALL ARTWORK by the amazingly talented Joshua Ellingson
For more information on this wacked out gal:
Tickle Kitten's Ivories at
"She reminds me of a 1920's MUPPET"
Audience Member @ Martuni's Show
"New York May Have Broadway, But San Francisco has Suzanne Ramsey aka Kitten on the Keyes, a talented burlesque singer who writes her own music, sings, dances, plays piano, accordion, and ukulele!"
Flavorpill Nightlife Review
"San Francisco's Own "IT" Girl"
Gary Meyer Cinema Treasures Balboa Theater
"She's A Hoot and A Holler!"
"Zany and Talented"
"Kitten on the Keys is new Burlesque's Clara Bow"
"One of the evenings highlights at the NY Burlesque Festival was Kitten On The Keys!"
Trisha Romano Village Voice NYC
"To hell with being PC; this is way more fun! "
Robbie Gennet Keyboard Magazine
"Classy and sassy like Haile Selassie, radient pianist Kitten on the Keyus resurects spirits of flappers and Tin Pan Alley with as much fetching double entendre that you can cram in a Coca Cola Bottle."
David Cotner LA Weekly
"Kitten on the Keys Stole the show with her bawdy, sexy, and uncensored Performance!"
Steve Murray Viva Variety
"The Queen of San Francisco's New Burlesque"
Steve Murray Viva Variety
"Charming yet disturbing"
Vancouver Commadore Ballroom
"She's da BOMB Curve Girl Most Likely to Succeed"
"Sweet in her insanity, silly and wise"
SEX Kitten online review
"She's the Ruth Wallis of the 21st century!"
DC Gurly Show
New CD Info:
Available on CD Baby.com
Kitten on the Keys recorded her 4th Studio CD "Salty Meat Girl" in honor of a recent three month residency with the French Produced Show "Cabaret New Burlesque" in Nantes, France May-Sept 2007 . She has toured with this show four times and wanted to write songs that would be familiar yet break the language barrier with over the top antics and promote smuttiness......
There are MANY wonderful covers on this CD including the Betty Boop Theme Song,
Mae West's Mr Deep Blue Sea, I want to be bad (the first 1920's music I owned thanks to Peter Mintum of Cockettes fame!), Ukulele Ike's "My Dog Loves Your Dog",
Hot Nut Swing, The Pussy Cat Song-Complete with my own pussy posse PUSSY
SCAT RAP, and Brel's dramatic Amsterdam...which can also be Hamsterdam or Dental Dam.......depending on the mood I want to set. Oh and one film buff LOVED my cover and insertion of "San Francisco" into Lida Roberti's Big # from Million Dollar Legs (1939) It's Terrific (When I Get Hot)
I Wanna Be Like Liberace-who doesn't! I wrote this after I was allowed to play his mirrored Baldwin Grand at his museum in Las Vegas...I wept and thought I would go to HEAVEN....My new name is Libera-SHE (I do him in drag with Gregangelo's Velocity Circus!) or Libe-CROTCHY when I am feeling frisky and freaky!
Pope Mobile: Conspiracy Theory! They Euthanized the POPE! I wrote the lyrics while he was dying....he left behind a cool car like the weiner mobile or Bat Man's Batmobile. I was suddenly touched again by him and his botched tracheotomy SO I wrote the tune ASAP-the cheesy keyboards reflect his assension into HEAVEN. amen. harumpf.
Leather Daddy......a true story...how pent up our little kitten really is. After a horrible marriage-she begs her husband to do a little somethin' somethin' to get her goin'-
like just some basic SM 101? PLEASE!!!!!!
so.....while in France.......
I would ask audience members to come up and slap my ass along with the music-
so I had to learn "Slap My Ass Harder!" in French.......(bumtap sur la fesse si vous plait!) . They are quite a rhythmic nation......my ass was SO BLACK AND BLUE when we were doing 6 mights a week.....At one point I had "little People" from the cover band "MINI KISS" slapping my ass while I am half nekkid in a pretty black and red Weimer-esque look-black corset and bitch boots with shirley temple hair.
VERY SURREAL...their hands were very small. They thought their hotel room was small. WOW- .....I love a good foreign cunt-try.
Salty Meat Girl is about....craving salty meat A LA MODE when your hormones are out of wack.....I modeled it after one of my musical heroines-Dinah Washington!
I love her double entendres! Heck, this one is so OBVIOUS though! I heart MEAT!
I have a funny outfit I made especially for this # ..... sparkly dog chew toys in the shape of meat. I have a hot dog pussy, hamburgers on my ass and chops on my boobies while I nibble a chicken leg....HMMMMM meat!
Geriatric Punk Rock Boyfriend is gonna be the first Music Video-
I am hoping this AMAZING video artist will collaborate with me from France.
We ran out of time.
THink about it....punk rock has been around A LONG TIME...all of my heros are dying like Johnny Ramone etc....So I wrote this about my boyfriend who spent
LOTSA years in the SF Punk Scene with Flipper and Polkacide to name a few.
The little dance that goes with it is HILARIOUS.......I forsee it bigger than the chicken dance or Macarena.......(wishful thinking)
PETA Puta-someone is mad a a role playing DOGGY! Get your muzzle outa here! Dog vs Cat on this Silly Vaudevillian tour de Farce!!!
I just put out a cute coloring book called "color Me KITTEN" inspired by the illustrations of Joshua Ellingson! www.joshuaellingson.com
Just appeared on the Boob Tube-National Geographic's "Secret History Of The Bra"
Photos appear on playing cards www.pokerburlesque.com from France.
More plans to return to Europe-where they seem to like her!
Look for the one woman avante musical "Does This Piano Make My Ass Look Big?"
You can catch her at a variety of venues in the Bay Area and Beyond! Sometimes VERY BEYOND!
People who are interested in Dinah Washington Mae West should consider this download.
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