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MP3 Jesus H Christ and The Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse - Jesus H Christ and The Four Hornsmen Of The Apocalypse

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Critics from The New Yorker to the Village Voice to Trouser Press agree: JHC&TFHotA's debut is "Awesome." "Glorious." "Sardonic." "Hysterical." "Thundering." "Hard."

13 MP3 Songs
ROCK: Modern Rock, POP: Power Pop

New York-based Jesus H Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse are an eight-piece rock/pop/punk/folk/metal/cabaret band. Likened to B-52s meets X-Ray Spex meets Weezer meets Blood Sweat and Tears, the JHC "difference" is horny, thinking-person's, emotionally-bare lyrics protectively cloaked in hard candy pop. All original, stylishly diverse, stick-in-your-head songs about being bicoastal, stealing your boyfriends' Kenneth Anger and Balzac references, compassion fatigue, boobs, Old Lyme, and widower-lust, with roaring guitars and celestial horns. Poignant, laughable, awash in sound and fury, signifying nothing, but saying everything that no one usually dares to say, JHC&TFHotA are really just eager to be held and loved. At which point they'll become distant and forget to buy toilet paper.

JHC had the #1 most requested song on Sirius Alt Nation for more weeks in a row than any song ever! Also playing and/or charting on: WFMU, KROQ, KPFK, WBRS, KXLU, CFUV, & KRCL, WTJU, WPKN, WNEC, WKDU, WTJU, WRTC, WRQC, WAPS, CJIQ, Z100, Radio Xenu and many other stations with savoir faire and joie de vivre and je ne sais quoi.

See JHC website or for upcoming shows.

"This lovable local band transcends the novelty of its name with wry, thundering power-pop songs about such previously underexplored subjects as the boredom of living in the Constitution State (âConnecticut Is for Fuckingâ), the appeal of the recently widowed (âDo Meâ), and how pharmaceuticals can help love (âHappy Meâ)."

NO DEPRESSION (David Menconi): "Picture NRBQ with a metallic pop edge and an expanded horn section, fronted by a singer who looks a bit like Julia Louis Dreyfus, sounds a bit like Sarah Vowell and writes a bit like Amy Rigby only much nastier. There you have this wonderful New York band, who will completely rock your world. Risa Mickenberg and Joel Sheltons songs are side-splittingly funny, starting with Connecticuts For Fucking (because its a place where thats all there is to do) and its turn-on-a-dime shifts between metallic snarl and acoustic jingle-jangle. Happy Me cops the Beatles Nowhere Man guitar riff for a bridge. Vampire Girls rollcalls the slyest geek-culture hall of fame this side of High Fidelity. And weve had great fun in my social circle debating which acquaintance is most like the shrewish hellion in Obviously. Best of all, the music holds up after the laughter subsides."

Risa Mickenberg writes and sings satirical theater songs accompanied by g-b-d-and-sometimes-k, two trumpets, and two trombones. All assume the p.o.v. of a neurotic young professional womanâloan officer, publicist, social planner, perhaps even actressâwho may be Risa Mickenberg. Some of these songs are funny, the rest very funny. "Connecticut's for F*cking" seems self-explanatory, "Ellen's Bicoastal" cl*se enough; "Happy Me" is about falling in love on meds, "Vampire Girls" about sucking knowledge from your boyfriends. The jewel is the jealous fit "Obviously"â"I don't care. I mean I think she's a skank, but whatever, I don't care. I just don't see why you're denying it when it's obvious you two slept together . . . "

TROUSER PRESS (Ira Robbins): "Sardonic adult humor in music is amply illustrated by this entertaining New York octet (half of it being the Four Hornsmen, who add to, without ever overwhelming, the simple rock music with brass). Delivered in Risa Mickenberg's winning matter-of-fact voice, "Connecticut's for F*cking" is hysterical, a deadly putdown of the Nutmeg State as a nadir of middle-class tedium that proffers copulation as the only entertaining alternative. And "Vampire Girls," which passingly sounds like the Replacements' "I Don't Know," explodes the little-known problem of women "who seem like they're really cool until you realize that everything that's cool about them is something they sucked out of their ex-boyfriends" with a laundry list of modern-trendy Henry Higgins acquisitions, from Balzac to Karen Black, Iggy Pop to Photoshop."

THE TUCSON WEEKLY: (Linda Ray) "If you read and loved A CONFEDERACY OF DUNCES or A HEARTBREAKING WORK OF STAGGERING GENIUS, this record is for you.... A collection of intelligently observant and wryly amusing pop/rock/punk takes on gender politics (read: sex and its complications), the state of the United States (especially Connecticut) and certain everyday characters and their quirks. All are set in fine musicianship, with Brian Wilson-worthy harmonies and imaginative arrangements."

POP MATTERS (Jason MacNeil)
"JHC&TFHotA are an odd blend of Sixpence None the Richer, Arcade Fire, and New Pornographers if they were all fronted by Amy Sedaris. âConnecticutâs for Fuckingâ is a hard-the-soft-then-hard power pop tune that talks about the Nutmeg State with sweet, sugary harmonies in the chorus as she simulates what Robin Williams once described as âthe bone danceâ.. Mickenburg nails the conversational and brassy rocker âObviouslyâ with a Lou Reed-like charm. A lot of the songs would be great on Desperate Housewives, particularly the opportunistic and cheery âDo Meâ. .. The summer-sounding pop of âVicki Is a Proâ is great, resembling a cross between the Cars and the Go-Gos. Ditto for the fabulous âItâs OK in the USAâ. âVampire Girlsâ name-drops Syd Barrett, Tiny Tim, Malcolm X, and others while the punk riffs blend with horns. Another highlight is the rather mainstream bubblegum pop of âEllenâs Bi Coastalâ. âSteve Baylorâ has to be one of the oddest, Zappa-like tracks of the year, and âNipplesâ is a modern day hit the Turtles failed to get around to."

THE VILLAGE VOICE (George Smith):"Hard and horny, Jesus H Christ! The && Apocalypse is coming!â âAn eight-person horn-fired local group making glorious hard pop!" âHammering punkarama, namechecking Saul Bellow, Philip K. Dick, and Jerry Lewis!â âHorns and guitar drive a tank made of suntanned California riff right out of the speakers!â

NEW YORK MAGAZINE: "Smart, catchy power pop!"

TIME OUT New York: "Not just a carpenter and a compassionate religious icon, Jesus H Christ is also a novelty-pop band fronted by the delightfully baby-voiced Risa Mickenberg who sings in sugar-sweet tones about being courted by the crazy guy down the street. Consider it the musical equivalent to Strangers With Candy."

THE BOSTON HERALD: âObviously you slept with that girl from your reunion,â quips B.U. alum Risa Mickenberg in one of her hilarious tunes. Elsewhere she tells a former boyfriend it was just the meds keeping their love alive and orders a recently widowed man to bed her, all with deadpan sarcasm. It takes an eight-piece half-punk/half-brass band to back the nervy and mighty amusing Mickenberg."

THE VITAL VOICE (ST LOUIS) "Jesus H. Christ and The Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse, âConnecticutâs For F***ingâ: If Jill Sobule (âI Kissed A Girlâ) got busy with Weird Al and they had a fling with Courtney Love, the result would be this band. Fun lyrics mixed with a hard driving beat combine to make the summerâs most unforgettable song. Lead singer Risa Mickenbergâs erotic vocals are reason alone to buy this track."

THE BOSTON GLOBE: "The most raunchy fun!"

THE CAPE CODDER: "Like Zappa, they'll shock a certain percentage of the population - and absolutely delight the rest of it."

SOMEONE ON I GUESS I'M FLOATING: "Catchier than chlamydia in a co-ed dorm!"

THE BOSTON METRO: "Jesus H Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse are hilarious!"

THE BOSTON PHOENIX: "Upscale!" "Sequined!" âBald!â

JHC&TFHotA members have played with Prince, Elvis Costello and Twiggy, with the Metropolitan Opera Orchestra, under the direction of Leonard Bernstein, on Broadway in numerous shows including Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Wicked and in The Producers. Literary credits include a Pushcart Prize, writing for HBO and authoring the book Taxi Driver Wisdom. One "member" invented a delicious beer called High & Mighty!

Risa Mickenberg â Lead vocals
Joel Shelton â Guitar, Vocals
Will Shelton â Bass Guitar, Guitar, Vocals
Ray Grappone â Drums, Percussion
Mike Boschen â Trombone
Wayne DuMaine â Trumpet, Synth, Piano
Chris Olness â Trombone
Tim Schadt â Trumpet

Mixed by Dave Lee, who engineered albums by The Beastie Boys, The The and The Bad Brains
Mastered by Alan Douches at West West Side Music whose mastering credits include Animal Collective, Sufijan Stevens, and Hole
Recorded at Hipbone Studios, Red Hook, Brooklyn
Engineered by Vicki Bell
Produced by Joel Shelton and Risa Mickenberg
All songs written by Shelton and Mickenberg

All eight members of Jesus H Christ and the Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse invite you to be among the early-adopting, visionary tastemakers to own this limited collectors' edition fourth pressing of our debut CD. This classic is a cutting edge pre-heirloom that discerning intelligent upscale drinkers will treasure for generations.

The actual CD is a somewhat environmentally friendly object d'art that is a "must" for every decent human being's home. Clear all of that Django Reinhardt, Brian Eno and Motorhead off your shelves and make room for Jesus H Christ and The Four Hornsmen of the Apocalypse!

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